You’ve made your case, you’ve sent the mail. You’ve followed up, circled back, clarified the strategy, offered the solution.
And still: nothing. Silence. Delay. Indifference. The system doesn’t move.
So what do you do? You get frustrated. You push again. A little harder this time. You speak up, a bit louder. You go in with urgency, passion, conviction. Because you know it’s the right thing — and if you don’t stand for it, who will?
But here’s the trap:
You can’t win by being the most frustrated person in the room. Not in corporate life, not in politics, not in leadership. The system doesn’t reward frustration. It absorbs it — then labels it.
You become “difficult,” “emotional,” “too much.” And nothing changes.
Why We Get Stuck Here?
Because we care, because we want to fix things. Because we assume the obstacle is a misunderstanding and “if we just explain better, louder, longer, people will see.”. Not.
Often the block isn’t logic but structure. It’s about incentives, power lines, personal risk or hidden history. Something they might not explain to you, because of their own power, goals or hidden agendas. Maybe they are not allowed but cannot tell you. Maybe a senior made a public bet that your idea now undermines or your success would threaten someone else’s visibility. Or maybe your timing is just off. Thing is: when a system doesn’t move, it’s not always resisting you. It’s protecting something, or someone.
And that’s the part most people miss: The wall you are running into is telling you something
The trick isn’t to keep pushing, but to pause and observe. Scan the context. Read the field. And realise: The wall is not the enemy, it’s a clue.
So What Do You Do Instead?
You stop pouring energy into the wall, mark it, map it, and redirect. Ask:
- Is this fixed — or does it move with time?
- Who benefits from the block staying up?
- Who else has run into this?
- What changes if I wait?
You stop trying to break the system with passion, and start moving through it being aware of it and finding out what’s “wrong”.
Frustration is Not Influence
The people who shape systems aren’t the loudest, they’re the ones who move with precision. Who know when to speak, when to wait, when to reframe. Doesn’t mean they are pushovers, they’re just not trying to win the wrong game.
Final Thought
If the system can’t hear you, don’t shout louder, get quiet and get smart. Step back, reflect, reframe, and then move from clarity, not noise. The moment you stop playing that frustrating game, you stop losing and start creating real change.